This auntie blogs too

Kind of lazy to blog today, after all, it is anniversary day!  And we pigged-out at a buffet lunch.

And since I had Simple English Test No. 1, I should have number 2, right?  I have to emphasize that these ‘tests’ are for Singaporeans only, as I’m picking on mistakes my fellow Singaporeans often make.

Do you:

• say regardless or irregardless?  If the latter, give yourself a hard smack!  Remember the Singapore Pledge that you used to recite in school everyday?  There’s no such word as irregardless, which, in case you haven’t noticed, is double negative.  So stop making me cringe!
• display a Close or Closed sign on the door of your shop?  If your shop is Close on Monday, is it very far away on other days?
• pronounce Dempsey  (as in Dempsey Road) as Demp-sie or Demp-zie?  Jean Danker, please take note, it’s NOT the latter.

Ok for now… I’m off to enjoy the last few hours of this special day!

I’ve loved dogs since young as my family always had at least one dog in our kampung house.  I like especially the big, strong, dogs, not those poochy poochy toy breeds.  I’ve not been able to have one of my own as Big Guy doesn’t have a liking for dogs.  Sigh!

After watching Gin, I really wish I can get one.  It’s been so long since my kampung days, and I really miss cuddling and running around with one.

Watch Gin, the ‘world’s most talented’ dog here, in Britain’s Got Talent’s first semi-final.

They made it into the finals, thanks to Simon and Amanda.

Sigh!  I suppose I can just dream about having my own dog one day…

Once every month, I will pay a visit to my dermatologist on Orchard Road for laser treatment and IPL.  Yes, this auntie has pigmentation problems, but nothing too serious yet.  I found this doctor through a beauty forum on the internet.  Incidentally, when I first consulted him, he asked me how I came to know about his services.  I told him that I found him through the internet.  He raised his eyebrows and said, ‘Oh!  I thought those who found me through the internet were mainly students!’ (like, aunties don’t use the internet, meh?).  Some men are just so insensitive!  Anyway, I put his remarks down to ‘men!’ and signed up for a treatment package with him.

One more thing about this doctor, during my first consultation, he asked if there was anything else I was dissatisfied with, concerning my face (besides pigmentation).  How can anyone ask a woman such a question?!  Of course I have lots of things I’m dissatisfied with – moles, wrinkles, lines, eye bags, open pores, the list goes on.  I believe if I had told him all these, his recommendations would make me very beautiful and Big Guy very broke (I think he’ll settle for a less than beautiful wife)!  So I took a deep breath and told him to concentrate on the pigmentation first. 

So I digressed – I call this once-a-month-day Auntie Day.  Each time after my treatment, I would hit the shops.  Luckily for Big Guy, I’m not a big spending auntie.  Most times, I end up buying stuff for the house or for Little Guy or better still, buying nothing.

BUT today’s a little different.  The Great Singapore Sale is on!  I was ready – I packed two Envirosax shopping bags and was ready to shop, shop, shop!

First stop was Isetan where I was nearest to.  I have not bought anything from there for ages.  But today, I surprised myself by almost filling up my shopping bag there.  I bought some toys at 20% discount to add to the secret stash I have for Little Guy (for rewarding him when the occasion calls for it), some swim gear and clothes for Little Guy and myself.  I thought I had better leave there before I need to ‘activate’ my second shopping bag.

Next was Tangs, yes, I’m visiting them again less than two weeks after they made me feel very privileged.  Somehow, I find the Orchard Road branch more ‘complete’ than the one at Vivocity.  I can’t find everything I need at the VivoCity one.  Given that it has just been reported that CK Tang is in the red, I think they should just close the Vivo branch – its strategy of attracting a hip and young market there is just not working.  I don’t see the same volume of people there compared to that at the Orchard store.  I grew up with Tangs – having shopped with my mum at the original C.K Tang store (remember the flight of mosaic-ed stairs that led to right and left staircases?).  I really like the Orchard store very much, both the old and the new.  But this auntie is disappointed with the Vivo one.   I guess I must really like Tangs a lot to write so much about it.  Anyway…

So at Tangs, my shopping bag was ready to burst at its seams.  I grabbed two pairs of M.E.L sunglasses at $17.90 each.  I love cheap sunglasses – I can own many pairs then (actually, I wouldn’t mind a Chanel one)! The promoter added to my bursting bag when she gave me a free umbrella, which I had not expected.  That was really cool (in the literal sense too) – I love surprises!

At the household department, I bought some stuff at 20% – 30% discount and got another freebie too!  It’s strange how the promoters only told me about the freebies when I buy their stuff.  Why not display that information to entice more people to buy?

I’m a happy woman today and decided to stop my spree after running an errand for my mum at Guardian’s at Paragon.  My bag was really about to burst and I certainly did not fancy lugging my ‘loot’ further down the road.  I had actually planned to make it through John Little and Robinsons. 

I guess that’ll have to wait till the next Auntie Day.

Oh, even as I stuffed my shopping bag to the brim and seams, I noticed that most people still use the bags provided by the stores.  That is quite sad – I must have saved at least ten plastic/paper bags today.

Why can’t a store give customers a nice reusable shopping bag which bears the store’s name; and give a rebate or a stamp card (to accumulate points) each time a customer returns and shops with this bag?  Won’t it save costs (and the environment) and make customers happy at the same time?

Oops, sorry for digressing so much in this post! 

I love Auntie Day!

Big Guy and I celebrate our fifteenth wedding anniversary later this week.  We were a couple for seven years before tying the knot.  That means that we have known each other for more than two decades!  Guess we can be considered as 老夫老妻!

I suppose now is the time to get nostalgic, remembering how we started and how we have come so far.  We were still in school when we met – I believe he was smitten with me the moment he saw me.  But it took a while for me to even notice him.  I guess his persistence paid off and so here we are.

What gives, after being together for so long?

Well, we are no longer the sprightly youngsters that we once were.  Let’s see:

• both of us have gained weight.  From skinny 45 kg to 52 kg – that’s me (yes, I can hear some protests – you probably think I’m some fat, out-of-shape auntie, right?  Erm… I’m also about 1.7 m tall.  Hehehe!).  Big Guy was a scrawny 60 kg and now a ‘paunchy’ 65 kg (at least that’s what he says).
• both of us are bothered by some grey hair
• Big Guy changed his ‘normal’ glasses to progressive ones

These are only the physical changes.  Changes in other areas were inevitable too.

• No more flowers – well, I put a stop to them as pragmatism rules – why let the florists earn when we can do more with the money?
• No more hand-holding over our burgers – that actually stopped even before we were married.  Besides, burgers are not healthy for our aging hearts!
• No more calls several times a day – if he did, I would get irritated!  Hehehe!
• No more hanging on or listening to every word I say – in a sentence of ten words, he probably ‘takes in’ the first two words and the last word, leading to loss of information.  ‘Got meh?  You told me meh?’, is what he would say… well, I’m guilty of this sometimes too!

Thinking back, the best years were the first three years of marriage – when everything was sweet and exciting.  After that, we just got settled down as things became routine and we could sort of read each other’s minds.

Hmm… I wonder if he can read my mind this time – wouldn’t mind getting flowers, you know? 

Happy Anniversary Big Guy!  Let’s go pig out!

It has been one-and-a-half month since I started this blog.  Well, so far, so good.  I got more hits than I had expected.  I had told only two friends about this blog (not sure if they even bothered) and nobody else.  Not even my very large family and Big Guy (not yet, anyway). 

The post with the most hits was Naked Ambition.  I did not think it was a great post.  But I was glad that I posted it, not because it got the most hits, but because it let on that people are a perverted lot (more than we want to admit).

You see, they got to my post because they searched for terms like:

• nude
• nudity
• nude blogs
• naked men
• naked women
• naked in public
• *** update 26/05/08  – half nude aunties (!!)

Well, you get the picture… if you want more hits, just have these key words in your post or tags.

The post with the second highest number of hits was about Hillary Clinton.  I guess it’s because she is the ‘hottest’ woman in the US now (I just think that she is delusional and wasting money).

I’m not sure who visits my blog as most are silent readers.  Wish more people would leave comments though.  Besides looking out for hits, bloggers do like comments from readers, you know?

Ah, well, perhaps that’s not important as I started this blog to hone my writing skills and also to put the thoughts in my head into words.  I do think I have done quite well to achieve these two goals.

Don’t you?  

Comment leh…

I’m sure everyone had experiences where people make you roll your eyes and go, DUH!

I used to have many such moments with my ex-boss, but can’t remember most of them ‘cos I’ve tried to toss out memories of her to save ‘brain space’.

The latest duh! moment I had was at Cafe Cartel at Marina Square.

It was on Mother’s Day when we had just finished a Japanese dinner.  Big and Little Guy suggested dessert and we decided to pop into Cafe Cartel to have their favourite Urban Bread Pudding.  *** Yah, it was Mother’s Day and Little Guy chose Japanese food because he likes sushi and made the decision for dessert as well! ***

Anyway, we ordered a piece of banana rum cake and the Urban Bread Pudding (and nothing else).  The cake was served promptly but Little Guy’s dessert was not served, even after I had finished the cake.  He was getting cranky (so was Big Guy who was waiting to share it).

I signalled the waiter and asked him if they had forgotten the order.  His reply got us all rolling our eyeballs out.  He said that was a dessert item and we had to tell them when it was to be served.  *** Roll eyes *** DUUUUH!

Controlling my eyeballs (before they rolled out), I told him that we only ordered dessert - but I believe he walked away thinking that he was right!  Man, what’s wrong with these people… I mean, you don’t even need initiative to do this right, right?!

Ok, that was the most recent duh! moment.

There were others from some time back like this one:

A manager (a senior one) came out of his room in a fluster and told me that something seemed to be wrong with his keyboard.  I was just an innocent girl (ok, auntie) who happened to sit outside his room.  I asked him what the problem was.

He said that now, every time he typed something, the word in front gets overwritten.  My ‘duh!’ alarm bells were ringing in my head.  I maintained my composure and went into his room to ‘investigate’.  I pressed the ‘Insert’ key and ask him to try again.  And wow!  I solved his ‘problem’!

I didn’t look at his face to see whether he was embarrassed or thankful.  I just had to get out of his room before I exploded into uncontrollable laughter!  Bwahahaha! DUUUH!

I mean, he must have been using a computer for at least two decades, and he has never used the ‘Insert’ key or knew of its existence?!  Could this make it into Ripley’s ‘Believe It or Not’?

Oh, now I remember one of the many duh! moments with my ex-boss.  This happened shortly before I quit (maybe that’s why it’s still occupying my precious brain space).

I had told her that Big Guy had gone to Ireland for a week.  And she said, ‘Oh!  Eastern Europe is a very nice place, but very expensive too.’  Ireland’s in Eastern Europe?  DUUUUH!

I did not waste my brain cells correcting her, or even furthering the conversation.  After all, our jobs had nothing to do with geography and I didn’t want to add any more load to her already very confused brain. 

And oh, she’s the same person who did not connect her network cable to her notebook and complained that the notebook was down.  DUUUH!  Damn!  Why is it that I still can recall so much of her?  How much of my brain space is she still occupying? 

Maybe all the duh! moments’ space?  I have a feeling I will be posting about this again, hence the (I) in the title.

Till then, have a duh!-free day!

Seven-and-a-half months after I quit my job to stay at home (‘to get happy again’ as I wrote in my farewell e-mail), I still have great difficulty putting down housewife as my occupation.

It’s not that I despise housewives or anything, but I find the term just too archaic.  It doesn’t really describe what I do.  Yes, I do the chores (wash, cook, clean and iron) and make sure Big Guy and Little Guy get what they need, physically and emotionally.  But these do not take up all of my time.

Hey, I’m now blogging from L7 at the National Library!  (Oh, yes, gotta be home in time to cook dinner!)

Another term I could use to describe my occupation is homemaker - but the definition of it is exactly the same as that of housewife.  So no, I’m no homemaker.

I’ve pondered over this and thought maybe I could use these:

• part-time writer – after all, I did submit a couple of articles to an online writers’ website… hmm… maybe not, as a couple of articles don’t a writer make.
• blogger – just started blogging last month, but although it’s become a very interesting aspect of my life, it’s more of a pre-occupation than an occupation.  I’m certainly no xiaxue or mr brown!
• freelance transcriber – I did quite many transcriptions for a couple of academic researchers (sourced thru’ Facebook).  But I’ve since taken a break from it, as it’s time-consuming and the pay was pathetic (I only like the fact that I could actually ‘eavesdrop’ without getting into trouble).
• unemployed – this sounds depressing.  But I have used it with glee several times.  When irritating credit card/line telemarketers call, I just need to say that I’m unemployed and they thank me apologetically and hang up!  Hehehe!
• internet researcher – I like this one as I really do a lot of ‘research’ on the net.  I watch YouTube videos, read news on foreign news websites, check out other people’s blogs, do online shopping and selling, give or ask for advice on forums, monitor and trade stocks, etc, etc.  This keeps me busy for half the day, at least.

Hmm… so what am I?  Ok, maybe I’ll check up on the definition of occupation first.  The Merriam-Webster online dictionary describes it as the principal business of one’s life – doesn’t really help me at all.  Given that I spend half of each day on myself – usually in front of my computer, and the other half on ‘maidly’, motherly and ‘wifely’ duties, what’s my principal business then?

Maybe I can give myself one of those cum-cum title.  So it could be internet researcher-cum-blogger-cum-maid-cum-wife-cum-mother-cum-etc?  Quite a mouthful, isn’t it? 

Perhaps I can just put undefinable under under Occupation?

I think somebody should come up with a new term, pronto!

In the wake of the devastating earthquake in China and the cyclone in Myanmar, I truly wish that those super heroes I watch with Little Guy on TV were real.

Seeing the flattened villages and crumbled buildings and the mounting death toll, we can only feel an immense sense of helplessness and hopelessness.  All those in the thick of the action must be emotionally drained and physically exhausted by now.  What can we do?  Nothing but sigh and lament.

If only Superman was real – he with the super strength, speed and X-Ray vision.  Oh!  How different things would be.  If only his colleagues in Justice League were real too.  If only we had some alien friends from different planets to come to our rescue…

If only we can turn back time…

Yes, perhaps I’ve been watching a tad too much TV with Little Guy…

***  Update 25/05/08 – hey!  Did this writer use my idea for his article I read on MSN?

Recently, I’ve taken an interest in Hillary Clinton.  I have ‘passed’ much of the news about the long, drawn-out campaign between this woman and Barack Obama, as really, I, an ordinary auntie, cannot see how the outcome would affect me here in tiny Singapore (a place which many Americans still think is part of China).

But this lady is a fighter!  And as a fellow auntie (a junior one compared to her), I started to take notice of her speeches, interviews, campaign trails and her campaign funds.  Her funds are fast running out and she has sunk – get this, more than US$11 million (S$15 million) of her and her husband’s money into her campaign!!  If you think that is a lot of money, well, her campaign fund (from donors and well-wishers) as of March 2008 is more than US$190 million!  And she is struggling with a deficit!

And this is only for the nomination to be the Presidential candidate.  Go add up all the money she had used for her 2000 and 2006 campaigns for the New York Senate seat.  *** Faint! ***

Of course, like her, all the other candidates had their campaign funds too.  And Obama’s fund probably will set a new record given the endorsements that he’s getting now.

Go add up all the money they used for this campaign (my calculator would probably show me a string of ‘E’s).  Isn’t it grossly obscene?  I mean, if they spent the same amount of money helping the poor or whatever other worthy causes in the world (instead of trying to outdo each other from the same party), all the world will be better off?

Oh, dear, I have digressed.  I was supposed to be writing about Hillary, not about $$$.  But I couldn’t help it – the staggering $$$ figures made me breathless!

Although analysts have said that the race is over for her, she is still not giving up.  I can understand why.

I imagine her, as a little girl:

Hillary’s mum:  What do you want to be when you grow up?

Little Hillary:   The President of America.

And she must have planned her whole life for it – marriage (to a man of presidential calibre), and the obligatory child to complete the family image.  And not ‘derailing’, no matter what happens – supporting Bill all the way even through the Gennifer Flowers and Monica Lewinsky episodes.  Her appropriately timed election into the New York senate in 2000 to lay the groundwork – note that she did not contest in 2004.  All these for the big one in 2008.  She is one patient and determined lady.  But alas, it does seem now that all is not to be.

But of course she has to plod on.  It’s hard for her to swallow – something that she had lived and planned all her life for is at stake.  Her dream is in shambles.

Should she just swallow the bitter pill and accept the ’consolation prize’ and be Obama’s running mate?  Maybe… probably…

I just shudder at the thought of those millions of dollars they are going to spend against McCain.

Considering that both Bill and Hillary Clinton are in this ‘business’, can you imagine the total amount of campaign funds they have spent?  Ditto for papa Bush and Bush junior?  Must be enough to feed an impoverished Third World country for several centuries?  *** Shudder! ***

I think I’d better tune out of this altogether (else I might just suffer from chronic shuddering)!

Do you have a secret ‘ambition’ to appear in the nude in public?

Yes?  Then you would be one of those interested in Spencer Tunick’s works of art – if you can call them that.

I thought I’d better not post pics of his works lest I get into trouble with whatever authorities.  But check out this news link about his work in Vienna.  This place (Ernst Happel stadium) is where the Euro 2008 finals will be played.  *** Warning - many little nude men and women!! ***

For those with immense interest in Tunick and wish to participate in his next installation, you can sign up here – they even have a colour chart for you to indicate your skin colour!  See what you might get yourself into in this YouTube video (one of many there).

He did mention that it has been difficult getting approval to have his installations done in the US.  So I guess we won’t even dream of him coming to ‘install’ anything here.

Hmm… if he did, will you sign up?

And NO, I have no such naked ambition!